My Impending Doom
It seems being angry all the time isn’t such a good thing after all.
A couple of weeks ago, I came back from lunch and noticed I was red as a beet. I don’t usually have a florid complexion; in fact, quite the opposite. Naturally I was concerned. I have the advantage of working with several nurses, so I asked one of them to take my blood pressure. It was 140/109, which I have since learned is ridiculously high for a 34 year-old young fella like myself. I had my blood pressure taken at work each day the following week. 150/103. 138/91. These are not good numbers, as the first should be around 120 and the second should be below 80.
High blood pressure runs in my family. My father is on 3 different medications for it following heart surgery several years ago (on St. Patrick’s Day, of all days). My paternal grandfather had it, and my grandmother has it. This family history, plus with the reality that I drink like a fish, eat what I want, rarely (if ever) exercise and am roughly 30 lbs. overweight, means I have a problem.
I could conceivably fucking die from this.
So, I made an appointment with my doctor, who can’t see me until the end of May (I know, I know…get a new doctor, Piper). When he does, he will most assuredly tell me to stop drinking and to exercise more. He will also, in all likelihood, prescribe blood pressure medication.
In my short but colorful life thus far, I have managed to avoid any form of daily medication. In other words, I am not on allergy pills, diet pills, antidepressants, anti-anxiety medications, antipsychotics, anti-inflammatories, anti-fungals, STD inhibitors, painkillers or mood regulators. I do not consume recreational drugs (aside from alcohol), and never have. I take drugs when I’m sick, and then only grudgingly. Therefore, I'm a little perturbed about the prospect of being on daily medication for the rest of my fucking life. So I talked to my pharmacist, who happens to also be my father, and he gave me the good and bad points of being on blood pressure medication.
The good news is it will regulate my blood pressure so I won’t have a stroke or a heart attack at age 34. Also, it is very unlikely that the pressure in my veins will build until my eyeballs shoot out of my skull on fountains of blood, like a fire hydrant that’s been loosened. The bad news is I’ll have to limit my sodium and alcohol intake (two things I’m fond of), and I’ll have to exercise (something I loathe). Also, according to my father, high blood pressure medication will cause my libido to plummet, which is sort of good news, as anything that makes me jerk off less can only be a positive change.
Of course, if I lose about 20 lbs. or so before my appointment, drink less and watch what I eat, maybe I won’t have to go on medication at all. But that sucks, especially since I’m really into the cooking thing lately, and I want to try all kinds of great-looking recipes that aren’t all that good for you. I don’t mean they’re junk food, they’re just sautéed or braised in butter, oil, or cream; loaded with salt or covered in rich sauces or cheese. Not exactly low-calorie, low-fat fare. Also, although my fervor for gin martinis has cooled somewhat, I’m once again very interested in wine and pairing wine with my culinary endeavors, so I’ve been drinking a lot of wine lately. And did I mention that Sam Adams Summer Ale is officially back in stores?
Anyway, as my latest shaving obsession has proven, I may not live long enough to die from hypertension after all. “Old Sharpy”, my straight razor, might very well make the whole blood pressure concern irrelevant. I’ll be posting more about my shaving misadventures soon, but for now the score is “Old Sharpy”: 6, Angry Piper: 0.
However, for the record, I consider the fact that I still have both my ears and nostrils a minor victory.
A couple of weeks ago, I came back from lunch and noticed I was red as a beet. I don’t usually have a florid complexion; in fact, quite the opposite. Naturally I was concerned. I have the advantage of working with several nurses, so I asked one of them to take my blood pressure. It was 140/109, which I have since learned is ridiculously high for a 34 year-old young fella like myself. I had my blood pressure taken at work each day the following week. 150/103. 138/91. These are not good numbers, as the first should be around 120 and the second should be below 80.
High blood pressure runs in my family. My father is on 3 different medications for it following heart surgery several years ago (on St. Patrick’s Day, of all days). My paternal grandfather had it, and my grandmother has it. This family history, plus with the reality that I drink like a fish, eat what I want, rarely (if ever) exercise and am roughly 30 lbs. overweight, means I have a problem.
I could conceivably fucking die from this.
So, I made an appointment with my doctor, who can’t see me until the end of May (I know, I know…get a new doctor, Piper). When he does, he will most assuredly tell me to stop drinking and to exercise more. He will also, in all likelihood, prescribe blood pressure medication.
In my short but colorful life thus far, I have managed to avoid any form of daily medication. In other words, I am not on allergy pills, diet pills, antidepressants, anti-anxiety medications, antipsychotics, anti-inflammatories, anti-fungals, STD inhibitors, painkillers or mood regulators. I do not consume recreational drugs (aside from alcohol), and never have. I take drugs when I’m sick, and then only grudgingly. Therefore, I'm a little perturbed about the prospect of being on daily medication for the rest of my fucking life. So I talked to my pharmacist, who happens to also be my father, and he gave me the good and bad points of being on blood pressure medication.
The good news is it will regulate my blood pressure so I won’t have a stroke or a heart attack at age 34. Also, it is very unlikely that the pressure in my veins will build until my eyeballs shoot out of my skull on fountains of blood, like a fire hydrant that’s been loosened. The bad news is I’ll have to limit my sodium and alcohol intake (two things I’m fond of), and I’ll have to exercise (something I loathe). Also, according to my father, high blood pressure medication will cause my libido to plummet, which is sort of good news, as anything that makes me jerk off less can only be a positive change.
Of course, if I lose about 20 lbs. or so before my appointment, drink less and watch what I eat, maybe I won’t have to go on medication at all. But that sucks, especially since I’m really into the cooking thing lately, and I want to try all kinds of great-looking recipes that aren’t all that good for you. I don’t mean they’re junk food, they’re just sautéed or braised in butter, oil, or cream; loaded with salt or covered in rich sauces or cheese. Not exactly low-calorie, low-fat fare. Also, although my fervor for gin martinis has cooled somewhat, I’m once again very interested in wine and pairing wine with my culinary endeavors, so I’ve been drinking a lot of wine lately. And did I mention that Sam Adams Summer Ale is officially back in stores?
Anyway, as my latest shaving obsession has proven, I may not live long enough to die from hypertension after all. “Old Sharpy”, my straight razor, might very well make the whole blood pressure concern irrelevant. I’ll be posting more about my shaving misadventures soon, but for now the score is “Old Sharpy”: 6, Angry Piper: 0.
However, for the record, I consider the fact that I still have both my ears and nostrils a minor victory.
posted by The Angry Piper at 2:09 PM
5 Comments:
I'm on high blood pressure meds. Enalapril and HCTZ.
1. The instructions caution me NOT to limit my sodium intake.
2. Neither have, nor do they specify that they will, decrease my libido. Then again I have the cure-all for that anyways.
So, it's not all that bad.
So I guess that means you have to get off your ass and try and get fit again, huh?
Isn't that a crying fucking shame.
By the way, my blood pressure is 116 over 74.
Sorry to hear about all this, bub.
You and I have an unfortunately similar family history. Both my grandfathers had high blood pressure and died from heart attacks. My one surviving grandparent has congenital heart failure and diabetes. My father has high blood pressure. Everyone in my family is overweight to obese.
With that kind of family history, I really don't have a choice, and either do you buddy. To live a normal lifespan, you are probably going to need to exercise at least 30 minutes of cardio a day. Find a treadmill and a way to entertain yourself while you run.
Good luck buddy.
Hey ass munch some of us follow your rss feed you know
Piper, did you tell the nurse in your lousy doctor's office what your BP has been lately? If so then you need to seriously get a new Dr if they are still making you wait.
I have a congenital heart defect, high BP runs in my family and my family is also overweight. I love wine and good food. You can have both, in moderation. Dont stop cooking, you enjoy that! Just cook small enough for you or invite friends to join you.
As far as exercise goes, I run daily. I dont want to die in my 30's. I believe you had a form of exercise at one time you really enjoyed too. You should consider it again.
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